


Crash and Burn

by Queenbean3



Category: DuckTales (Cartoon 2017), Wander Over Yonder
Genre: Crossover, Crossover Pairings, Drabble Collection, F/M, Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-18
Updated: 2017-10-08
Packaged: 2018-12-31 04:07:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 7,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12124182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenbean3/pseuds/Queenbean3
Summary: After aimlessly roaming the galaxy for a while, Dominator finds herself stranded in Duckburg and living with Launchpad. A collection of drabbles for a very weird crack ship that went too far.





	1. Put Some Clothes On

Launchpad used to daydream about having a cute girlfriend to wake up with every morning, but he never imagined she’d be a green alien babe who was formerly the greatest villain of another galaxy. Lord Dominator wasn’t so much a girlfriend as a scheming, lazy freeloader, but Launchpad was too nice to throw her out. When he crashed his plane into her orble transport and stranded her in Duckburg, she had nothing but the raggedy clothes on her back and no way to get off the planet. So he took her in, not realizing what he was getting himself into.

Today Launchpad was rushing through his morning routine. His parents were coming to visit for the first time in months and he wanted to look his best. Unfortunately when he finished his shower he couldn’t find the shirt he laid out on the bed. While he was searching the bedroom Dominator sat on the couch in one of his shirts and boxer shorts, channel surfing and eating from a bag of potato chips.

“Hey, Dee, have you seen my shirt?” Launchpad asked, feathers still wet from the shower and wearing only his pants.

Dominator didn’t look away from the TV and stuffed a handful of chips in her mouth. “Which shirt?” she said with her mouth full.

“The one I left on my bed while I was showering,” he replied, putting on his boots.

“Is it the brown button-up shirt you wear when you’re driving your cranky boss around town?”

“Yeah, that’s the one.”

“Nope, never seen it before.”

Launchpad frowned and stood in front of the TV, hands on his hips and red hair dripping in his eyes. “Come on, Dee, you’ve been sitting there all morning. Put some clothes on already, jeez! We have company coming! My folks are gonna be here in half an hour!”

Dominator frowned back, pink eyes narrowed into grumpy slits. “So what?” she asked, munching on her chips. “They’re not  _my_  folks.”

“Dee, you’re  _living_  with me,” Launchpad went on. “I still don’t know how I’m gonna tell them my new roommate is a space alien, and if you’re sitting around in my clothes that’s gonna make things even more awkward.”

Dominator rolled her pink eyes and groaned. “Fiiiine, I’ll put on those dumb clothes from the thrift store. Then will you be quiet and let me watch my shows?”

“Yes, good, thank you!” He turned around to leave but stopped. “Wait, are you wearing my brown button-up shirt?”

She smirked. “Took you long enough to notice.”


	2. A Real Friend

It was still raining outside as they drank their cocoa. Launchpad watched Dominator out of the corner of his eye and wondered if it was safe to ask what she’d been dreaming about. There was still so much he didn’t know about her and sometimes a question that seemed harmless to him would set off her temper. She was sitting in her kitchen chair with her mug in total silence, not looking at him and only taking a few small sips of her drink. The only sounds were raindrops hitting the windows and the distant rumble of thunder. 

Finally Launchpad decided to speak up. “So…crazy weather we’re having, huh?”

She grunted, still avoiding eye contact. Her messy white hair hid half her face, but what little he could see was definitely gloomy.

He tried to think of something else to say. If there was one thing he’d learned about Dominator in the time he’d known her, it was that getting her to open up was as hard as landing a plane with no landing gear. She could brag about her past destructive escapades and angrily rant about the fools who ruined her life, but she never went any deeper than that.

Well, just sitting around in awkward silence wasn’t doing any good. He took a drink of cocoa to moisten his dry mouth, swallowed a lump in his throat and spoke. “Hey, uh…Do you maybe…wanna talk about that nightmare?”

“No,” she said flatly.

He blinked, surprised that she’d said anything at all. “Oh. Okay then.”

Thunder rumbled outside. Dominator looked up from her mug and stared out the window. The flashing lightning was bringing back memories.

“You know,” she said with a wistful note in her voice. “I really miss being a villain. Flying through space in my wicked cool lava ship, blasting everyone in my way, drilling molten fluids from every planet and terrorizing the weak and pathetic… It was pretty awesome.”

Launchpad was confused over whether to feel relieved that she was finally talking, or disturbed over what she was talking about. “Eh heh…” he chuckled nervously. “Ya don’t say…”

Dominator drummed her fingers on her mug, nails clinking on the ceramic. “But ever since I got here, I feel like it wasn’t enough. Like something was missing all that time.”

He leaned forward slightly, growing interested. “Like what?”

She sighed and her breath fogged the window. “I don’t know. It’s like there’s a hole in my chest that wasn’t there before.” She turned her head to look at him, her blank expression still hard to read. “Do you ever feel like that?”

He wasn’t sure where this conversation was going, but this was the first time she’d ever asked him something like that. “Sometimes. Everybody has days like that.”

“And what do you do about it?” she asked.

He pushed his red bangs away from his eyes and scratched his head. “Well, usually I find somebody to talk to. Like I call my family, or hang out with my friends. Then I don’t feel so bad.”

Dominator’s blank expression turned into a scowl. There was that F word again. She groaned noisily and rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Uuuuugh. What is so great about having friends? All  _my_  friends were robot slaves, and look how  _I_ turned out.”

Launchpad arched an eyebrow at that last sentence. “Well, maybe that’s why you have a hole in your chest. You’ve never had a real friend until now.”

She scoffed. “Oh, yeah, Mr. Smarty Duck? What ‘real friend’ do I have?”

“Me,” he said simply. “I’m your friend.”

She gaped at him in silence for a moment. Then she scowled again and stood up with her half empty mug. “Whatever. I’m going back to bed. Don’t wake me up again.”

“Umm…” he said, confused by her sudden exit. “Good night!”

She turned her back on him and started walking away. Then, to his surprise, she grumbled “Good night” back to him.

Launchpad wasn’t sure what that meant, but he smiled and considered it a small victory.


	3. Bed Buddies

“You can’t banish me!” Launchpad said indignantly. “This is my bed, too! I’m the one who paid for this room!”  
  
Dominator grinned and leaned back against the pillows with her arms folded behind her head. “Tough toenails, McQuack. There’s only one bed in this room and I called dibs. Have fun sleeping in the tub!”  
  
Launchpad shuddered at the thought of sleeping in the tub. This cheap, shabby hotel in the Rocky Mountains was already cold and drafty but the bathroom was even worse, and the tub was even smaller than the bed and nothing but hard surfaces. The only way he could sleep in that cramped space was if he laid down sideways with his knees up to his chest, and there was no way he could stay like that all night.  
  
“Well, if you’re not getting out, then I’m coming in!”  
  
Clearly Dominator wasn’t prepared for that because her pink eyes went huge and her face turned from green to reddish green, but Launchpad didn’t notice as he squeezed into the tiny twin size bed beside her. After some struggling and fighting over the covers they were both squished together like sardines in a tin can.  
  
“Wow, great idea, genius,” Dominator grumbled. “Now if I move one billionth of an inch I’ll fall out.”  
  
“I dunno, I think it’s kinda cozy,” Launchpad said. “And it’s warmer with us sharing body heat. Y'know, This reminds me of the time I crashed in Siberia during a blizzard and this nice girl named Ulita let me spend the night…”  
  
“Launchpad, if you don’t want to choke to death on this pillow, go to sleep.”  
  
Ten minutes later Launchpad was fast asleep and snoring. Dominator jabbed him in the side with her elbow to get the noise to stop, but each time it came right back. She tried burying her head under her pillow to drown him out but it was no use. She even thought of smothering him with the pillow in his sleep and silencing him permanently, but that wasn’t an option. If she wanted to stay warm in this crummy bed she needed him alive.  
  
Actually that part wasn’t so bad. The bed really was warmer with him there, and it helped that he was covered in feathers. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, she had the urge to touch him. And not by jabbing him in the back with her elbow, either. She immediately pushed those thoughts away, telling herself it was too weird. Lord Dominator did not snuggle, especially not with big dopey ducks.  
  
But fate was against her. Still fast asleep, Launchpad rolled over and draped one big, heavy arm across her chest. His beak was now right next to her ear, snoring away louder than ever. It took all the self-restraint she had to bite back a scream and not kick him in the shins. Wait…this was even warmer than before, and in a weird way it was comforting. Was this what a hug felt like? Maybe this wasn’t so bad…  
  
Then he spoke, muttering in his sleep to someone in his dreams. “Mm…You smell so nice, Ulita…”  
  
Dominator didn’t hold back when she shoved him off the bed and onto the cold floor.


	4. Stop Being So Cute

It had been a long, exhausting week adventuring in Japan with Scrooge and his family. All Launchpad wanted to do was collapse on something soft and fall into a coma for eight hours. But when he came home he was surprised to find Dominator crouching in front of the oven, staring at it with the intensity of someone waiting for a bomb to explode. She didn’t even seem to notice him when he came in.  
  
“Um, Dee?” he asked, frowning in confusion. “What are ya doin’ down there?”  
  
She yelped in surprise and spun around, pressing her back up against the oven door. “Nothing! I’m not doing anything! How long were you standing there?”  
  
“I just got back from Japan,” he replied, setting his duffel bag on the table. He kept talking as he unzipped it and took things out. “Don’t you remember? It was somethin’ about some ancient cursed samurai armor. Man, what a crazy trip that was! But don’t worry, I still had time to buy you some souvenirs!”  
  
Dominator frowned, still on the floor blocking the oven from view. “You did what?”  
  
To her surprise Launchpad pulled a sword out of his bag, holding it up triumphantly over his head. “Check it out! An authentic plastic replica of an authentic samurai sword!”  
  
She stared at him blankly. “So in other words it’s a cheap toy?”  
  
He lowered the sword and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Eh, I know it’s not much, but it was all I could afford. Mr. McDee still won’t give me a raise.”  
  
Dominator rolled her eyes, knowing full well what a tightwad Scrooge was. “Well,” she said, about to change the subject. “It’s funny that you got me something, cuz I’ve got something for you.”  
  
Launchpad perked up, eyes wide with surprise. “You do?”  
  
She became embarrassed and looked away, muttering just audibly enough to be heard. “I-I mean it’s not done yet, and I’ve never made brownies before so they’re probably gonna suck, but…”  
  
His eyes grew big and sparkly and his face lit up with a delighted grin. “You made me brownies?? Dee, that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever done for me!”  
  
Grop, how that innocent happy face made her blackened heart melt. How dare he be this cute? Now she was turning red with embarrassment and annoyance. “Yeah, yeah, I’m a saint,” she grumbled. “Don’t make such a big deal out of it, fly boy.”  
  
“But it is a big deal,” Launchpad said, kneeling on the floor beside her and pulling her into a hug. “You’re the best, Dee! I’m gonna treasure your brownies forever!”  
  
Dominator’s body heat went up several degrees from that simple hug. She didn’t try to break away or hug him back, though. All she did was sit there and mutter “Stop being so cute.”


	5. My Favorite Nerd

Dominator spent every Saturday morning watching cartoons with a cup of coffee. Since being stranded on Earth she’d had to find completely new shows to watch, and cartoons never failed to entertain her. As for the coffee it wasn’t too bad for cheap instant stuff. The only thing she still hadn’t adjusted to was having a roommate, especially one like Launchpad McQuack.

During a commercial break Dominator got up and went to the kitchen to make a fresh cup of coffee. There she found Launchpad at the table with dozens of newspaper clippings spread out in front of him. Normally she didn’t care about his interests but she rarely saw him so focused on a task. He was carefully organizing the paper rectangles and gluing them neatly into a scrapbook. His brows were furrowed in concentration and his tongue peeked out the side of his beak. He didn’t notice Dominator when she came in, or turned on the faucet and used the microwave, or even when she was standing behind him with a mug of hot coffee and hovering by his shoulder.

Feeling mischievous, Dominator smacked the brim of his hat so it covered his eyes. “Boo!”

Launchpad yelped in surprise and dropped his glue stick and scissors on the floor, fumbling blindly and knocking some papers off the table. “Gah! Blackout! Get the flashlight!”

She grinned at his antics and sniggered impishly. “Relax, doofus, it’s me.”

He froze at the sound of her voice and looked up from under the brim of his hat. His entire face lit up with a big goofy smile at the sight of her. “Oh, heya, Dee! Thanks for turning the lights back on.”

She took a sip from her fresh cup of coffee and looked down at the papers on the table. “What’s all this junk?”

He bent down in his chair to scoop up the things he’d dropped. “They’re newspaper clippings for my Darkwing Duck scrapbook!”

Dominator picked up a clipping with a photo on it and arched one eyebrow in confusion. “Darkwing Who?”

“Darkwing Duck,” Launchpad repeated. “He’s the greatest superhero ever! I’m the president of his fan club here in Duckburg.”

The photo Dominator was looking at was a portrait of the aforementioned superhero. He was a short, skinny looking duck with a a purple hat and matching mask, coat, and cape, and like many other ducks on this planet he wore no pants.

“Must be a really small fan club,” Dominator said, unimpressed.

Launchpad bumped his head on the underside of the table before coming back up with a handful of clippings and his glue stick. “You should see the club in St. Canard where he works. They have, like, twelve members!”

This time Dominator arched both eyebrows and took another sip of coffee. “Wow, I had no idea you could count that high.”

Launchpad didn’t pick up on the jab at his intelligence and started placing the clippings back in their places. “He’s so cool! Someday I’m gonna meet him, and maybe he’ll even let me be his sidekick!”

She snorted, almost spitting out her coffee. “Yeah, right. Good luck with that, Captain Crashalot.”

“Thanks!” he said, missing the insult again. “Maybe I’ll even get to show him my plans for the Thunderquack, too.”

“The Thunder-what?” she echoed.

He pulled out a large sheet of paper from under his scrapbook and held it up proudly for her to see. It was a design schematic of a red and purple plane shaped like a duck’s head, all drawn in crayon. “Behold! The Thunderquack, designed and conceived by yours truly! Ain’t she a beaut?”

Dominator cringed at the plane’s goofy looks and was about make another snide remark about Launchpad’s intelligence when she looked at the design more closely. He had drawn the plane from different angles, all the parts were correctly labeled and measured, and there were technical notes written in the margins with pencil. If it had been rendered with better materials she would have thought it came straight out of an army lab. It still looked ridiculous, but if it was built the way he planned it it would actually work.

She gaped at the drawing in silence for a moment before looking back at him with wide eyes. “You designed this?”

He puffed out his chest with pride and rolled the large piece of paper up into a tube. “I sure did! And if I save up all my paychecks from Mr. McDee for the next 82 years, I’ll have enough funds to actually build it!”

Dominator could have easily turned that into another joke about how high he could count, but she was still in shock. Launchpad was such an accident prone doofus that it never occurred to her he might know something about planes besides crashing them. Maybe there really was a brain in that seemingly empty head of his. What else did she not know about him?

Finally she came back to her senses and said the first words that came to mind. “You’re a nerd. But my favorite nerd.”

Launchpad stopped in the middle of rubbing glue on the back of a scrap of newspaper. “What?”

Dominator frowned back. “What?”

He looked up at her in confusion. “It sounded kinda like you said something nice to me.”

She went stiff and silent, her stomach turning in knots as she realized he was right. Without meaning to she had given him a compliment for the first time ever. She never said anything nice to anyone unless it was actually a cruel joke, but this hadn’t been a joke. What was wrong with her? Was she going soft? Had living with this goofy idiot for so long finally gotten to her?

“D-Don’t be stupid,” she said with a frown, green cheeks flushing slightly from embarrassment and annoyance. “Go back to doing nerd stuff, nerd. My show’s back on.”

With that she turned and left the kitchen, leaving Launchpad more confused than ever.


	6. Water Wars

It had only been half an hour since Dominator was left alone at McDuck manor with Donald’s nephews and Webby. All the other adults had to leave the house for one reason or another. Scrooge had business to take care of at the money bin, Donald had another job interview, Mrs. Beakley had to buy groceries, and Launchpad had to pick up the limo from the dent repair shop for the fifth time that week. That left Dominator as the only adult in the house. Unlike the others she was a lazy, unemployed freeloader in the mansion and had only agreed to watch the kids if Scrooge paid her a hefty sum for it. He agreed to pay only because this was the first honest job the former alien criminal agreed to do since she started living under his roof.  
  
Launchpad was the first to come back from his errands. He didn’t need to be back so soon but he had known Dominator the longest. Although he trusted her, she tended to cause a lot of trouble. He couldn’t shake the feeling that the kids might accidentally burn the mansion down and she’d sit back and laugh as it happened. To his great relief the mansion was still standing, although the mailbox didn’t survive his sharp turn into the driveway.  
  
After parking the limo and locking it he started to go inside the house, but he heard the sounds of children screaming and Dominator’s familiar cackle coming from the back yard. A chill ran down his spine and his feathers stood on end. She wouldn’t torture children, would she?!  
  
He dashed to the back yard toward the sounds of the screams and found a scene of total chaos. There were two makeshift forts built on Scrooge’s spacious lawn, constructed entirely out of patio furniture. Behind one fort were Huey and Dewey, firing water balloons from a homemade catapult straight out of the Junior Woodchuck guidebook. Behind the other fort were Louie, Webby, and Dominator. Instead of a catapult they had some sort of cannon. Everyone was wearing swimsuits, goggles, and helmets.  
  
“We can’t keep this up, Dewey!” Huey said, panting as he loaded more balloons into the catapult. “We’re outnumbered!”  
  
“We wouldn’t be if Louie hadn’t switched sides!” Dewey complained. He shook his fist at the enemy fort. “Traitor! How dare you abandon your own brothers in the middle of a war??”  
  
“Hey, I’m no dummy!” Louie yelled back from the other fort. “I wanna be on the winning side, and they’ve got nachos over here!”  
  
“Smart move, cadet!” Webby chimed in, giving Louie a high five. “If you’re lucky you might get promoted!”  
  
“That’s for the general to decide,” Dominator said haughtily, light flashing off her goggles. She was wearing galoshes and a raincoat over her swimsuit. “Now fill up some more water balloons, cadets! I’m gonna check the cannon for leaks. Be ready to hit those nerds with all you’ve got!”  
  
Webby and Louie saluted. “Yes, General Dominator, sir!” they said in unison.  
  
Launchpad watched all of this from the patio, growing more and more confused. “Whoa,” he said at last. “What happened while I was gone?”  
  
Suddenly he heard Huey shouting his name. “LAUNCHPAD! Dewey! Look! Launchpad’s back! We’ve got a third team member again!”  
  
“Finally!” Dewey shouted. “Cover me, I’m gonna go get him!”  
  
Before Launchpad knew what was happening Dewey was dragging him across the lawn by the sleeve while Louie and Webby pelted them with water balloons. By the time they were safe behind the fort Launchpad was soaked down to his underwear and his soggy bangs were in his eyes.  
  
“Okay,” he said, spitting out broken balloon bits. “I’m gonna take a wild guess and say there’s some kind of water fight going on.”

“Yeah, it was our idea,” Huey explained, giving him a slightly damp towel to dry off with. “It started out as just a water balloon fight, but Dominator got the idea to build a water cannon and now it’s all out war.”  
  
“It was Boys vs Girls until Louie changed sides,” Dewey said, shaking himself off. “We managed to hold down the fort with this catapult, but we need more manpower. We can’t last much longer against that cannon without your help.” He clasped his hands and pouted up at Launchpad. “You WILL help us, won’t you?”  
  
Launchpad smiled, took off his soggy chauffeur cap and pushed his drippy bangs out of his eyes. This was perfect. Not only was this game with Dominator and the kids going well, but now he got to play, too. “Of course I’ll help, little buddies! What do you need me to do?”  
  
“Fill up as many water balloons as you can,” Huey replied, handing him a bag of empty balloons. “And throw them at Dominator’s team. If we can get them to surrender we can still win.”  
  
“Attention, dorklings!” Dominator’s voice boomed through a megaphone. “You may have increased your numbers, but we still have the superior weapon! Just surrender now and get it over with!”  
  
Launchpad poked his head over the top of the fort and cupped his hands around his beak to yell back at her. “Never! We have not yet begun to fight! Do your worst, you cowards!”  
  
“Okay, you asked for it!” Dominator lowered the megaphone and turned to her team with a wicked grin. “You heard him, cadets. Let’s show them how we do our worst.”  
  
Webby and Louie snickered to each other and saluted. “Yes, sir!”  
  
Moments later Launchpad, Huey, and Dewey were lying defeated among the wreckage of their fort, destroyed by a torrential jet of water blasted from the enemy cannon. Dominator, Louie, and Webby were all laughing maniacally and giving each other high fives.  
  
“Wow, thanks, Launchpad,” Dewey said sarcastically, picking himself up with his helmet knocked sideways and his goggles coming loose. “Got any more bright ideas?”  
  
“Is it too late to call a truce?” Launchpad said, coughing and spluttering as he sat up.  
  
“You really think Dominator’s gonna agree to a truce?” Huey asked.  
  
“No,” Launchpad admitted. “We’re totally doomed.”


	7. Movie Night

Tonight Dominator and Launchpad were watching a scary movie together. They were both on the couch and Dominator had gotten comfortable enough to sprawl out across Launchpad’s lap. He’d grown used to her lounging around the place like a giant house cat. And he was glad she was here. There was no way he could watch _Vampires from Planet X_ alone, and her snide running commentary made the old movie a little less scary.

“Oh, come on!” Dominator complained at the TV. “Why are they running away and leaving the car right there? Use the car, you morons!”

“That’s a good point,” Launchpad remarked, frowning in confusion. “This’ll just make them easier targets for the monsters–AAAA!!” He yelped as the helpless heroine was tackled to the ground by an alien vampire.

“Hah! Serves you right, Brenda!” Dominator ranted at the screaming woman in the movie. “That’s what happens when you don’t use your head! You get your blood sucked out and turn into an undead minion of the new alien overlords!”

Launchpad gulped audibly, his mouth dry and his throat tight. “Maybe this movie was a bad idea. You sure you don’t wanna watch something else?”

“Nah, I like a good bloodbath,” Dominator said, rolling onto her back to look up at him with an impish smirk. “You’re not getting scared, are you?”

“N-No, I was just…uh, I was wondering if YOU were scared.”

She chuckled dryly and reached up to tap his beak with one finger. “That’s a lie. I can tell when you’re scared, LP.”

He blushed under his feathers and frowned. “I’m not scared, I’m–” A flash of light and loud booming noise interrupted and he shrieked in terror. “whAT IS THAT?!”

Dominator sighed and sat up straight, still seated in his lap. “Calm down, dork. It’s just the thunderstorm outside.”

Without thinking Launchpad clung to her, eyes darting around wildly. “You sure it’s not those space vampires coming to suck our blood and turn us into one of their undead minions??”

“I’m positive it’s not them.” She took his face between her hands and turned his head toward hers, looking straight into his eyes. “But if it was them, they’d be more scared than you are.”

“They would?” he asked, still nervous as he looked back at her. “Why?”

“Because _I’m_ here,” Dominator said seriously. “And if any of them so much as laid a finger on your head, I’d break off their arms and stuff them down their throats.”

Launchpad stared back at her in amazement. “Wow, you’d really do that for me?”

“Gladly.” She smiled a playful smirk and kissed him lightly on the chin. “Now relax and enjoy the movie. There’s another twenty minutes left before it’s over.”

Launchpad nodded mutely as Dominator turned around to sit in his lap like an armchair and rested the back of her head on his shoulder. She didn’t see his lovesick schoolboy smile, but she let him rest his cheek against the side of her head and slide his arms around her waist. He didn’t scream once after that.


	8. I Think I'm in Love with You

The thing Dominator loved most about sharing a bed with Launchpad was the snuggling. She never imagined herself as the type to snuggle, but with a bed mate like Launchpad it was hard to resist. Not only did he keep the bed warm but he was covered in feathers. When she was drifting off to sleep she liked to rub her face against his chest and drag her fingers up and down his back, enjoying how soft and fluffy he was.

She could feel his lungs breathing and his heart beating underneath those layers of feathers. They were the most relaxing sounds in the world. In return he would stroke her hair and her smooth green skin and kiss the top of her head. Sometimes he would say things to her and she could hear his voice reverberating in his chest. And then she would squeeze him tighter, afraid that this was all just a dream and when she woke up she’d be drifting alone through the cold black void of space again.

“I wish this would never end,” she murmured one night as they were embracing in bed. Their legs were tangled and her hands were combing the feathers under his shirt.

“Me too,” he muttered, talking into her hair and gently stroking her back. “You’re way nicer to hang out with than Mr. McDee.”

“I’m serious, Launchpad,” she said, pressing her cheek against his heart. “I’ve never had something like this before. It makes the rest of my life feel so pointless. What does that mean?”

“Hmm,” he hummed and twirled a lock of her white hair around his finger. “I dunno, but my life’s been a lot better since you came along.”

She snorted. “You’re kidding, right?”

“No, I mean it,” he said honestly. “I love goin’ on adventures and hanging out with you. And it’s great havin’ someone to cuddle with every night. I haven’t done this with anybody in a really long time.”

Dominator chewed her lower lip in thought. “I’ve  _never_  done this with anybody.  _Ever_. It feels good, but it’s also kinda scary. Is that what love feels like?”

There was a pause as Launchpad’s brain processed what she had just said. “Wait, what?”

Her blood went cold. Grop damn it, she’d said the L word. Now the moment was ruined and she was starting to panic. She broke the embrace and rolled over to face away from him, pulling her knees up to her chest and forming herself into a protective ball. “Never mind. Forget it. It’s stupid.”

She heard him scoot closer to her back and felt his hand stroking her arm, soft feathers sliding over bare skin. 

“Come on, Dee,” he murmured, his warm breath giving her goosebumps. “You know me. I’m all about stupid stuff.”

She snickered, green cheeks turning several shades pinker. “Damn it, McQuack. How did you turn me so soft?”

He chuckled and wrapped his big arm around her slim waist, fingertips grazing across her stomach. “It’s a gift, I guess. So what’d you wanna say?”

Her mouth was too dry for her to answer. Her brain felt foggy and she was forgetting what she was going to say. There was a weird fluttering in her stomach and heat spreading everywhere he touched her. She couldn’t take much more of this. She had to say it before her resolve crumbled away and she lost her senses completely. So she blurted the sentence out so fast that it all sounded like one word.

“ _IthinkImightbeinlovewithyou_.”

If she didn’t have her back to him she would have seen the confusion on his face. “Huh? Was that English?”

Grop, she blew it. She buried her burning face in her hands, thanking her lucky stars that he couldn’t see how red she was. “I  _said_ ,” she began through gritted teeth, forcing herself to talk slower. “I…think…I’m…in…love…with…you.”

There was a long, tense silence.

“Oh.”

She waited for him to say more. When he didn’t she rolled over and sat up, frowning down at him. “That’s it? That’s all you’re gonna say?”

Launchpad stared blankly back at her, eyes wide with shock. At last he sat up and rubbed the back of his neck. “I dunno what I  _should_ say. I never thought I’d hear you say that.”

Dominator pulled her knees up to her chest again. “Me too.”

Another long, tense silence passed.

“Well,” Launchpad said at last, rubbing his neck some more and avoiding eye contact. “As long as we’re makin’ confessions here, I should tell you that…I think I’m in love with you, too.”

This came as no surprise to Dominator. Launchpad wore his heart on his sleeve and couldn’t keep his feelings secret. This was not the first time she’d received a confession of love from someone. However it was the first time she’d received a confession from someone she liked back. This was big, and she had to be sure it was real and not just a shallow crush like all the others.

“Do you mean that in a ‘you’re hot and I want to get in your pants’ kind of way, or a ‘I respect and care about you as a person’ way?”

He scratched his head, confused by the question. “Um…. both? I mean, sure, you’re super hot and gettin’ in your pants would be fun, but if you don’t  _want_  me in your pants I respect that. I’m happy just hangin’ out with you like this.”

She smiled gratefully at him. That was the sort of answer she was hoping to hear. “Thanks, LP. You know, I underestimated you. I used to think you were just another clueless dummy with his head in the clouds. But you surprised me.”

He looked back at her, still confused. “I did?”

She nodded and wrapped one long arm around his broad shoulders. “Sometimes you can be pretty clever, and you really care about everybody. You’re, like, the realest guy I’ve ever met. And you’re not a terrible pilot, either.”

He grinned and scratched his head somewhat shyly. “Awww, shucks, Dee. You’re makin’ me blush.”

She kissed him on the cheek and grinned. “Good. So what happens now? Like, what’s the next stage of this relationship thing?”

He tapped his chin with one finger, brows furrowed in thought. “Um, I guess we could do some other stuff we haven’t tried yet.”

“Like sex?” She said this so bluntly it caught him completely by surprise.

He cleared his throat, his face heating up under his feathers. “Uhhhh… is that what you want?”

She shrugged. “Nah, not yet. I’m just asking.”

“Oh,” he said, feeling an odd mixture of relief and disappointment. “Yeah, sure. We could try that sometime. And we could do other stuff, like going out on a date.”

Dominator smirked. “You mean that adventure with the zombies in the cursed graveyard wasn’t a date?”

Launchpad chuckled awkwardly. “Yeah, uh, I was thinking maybe we could do something where nothing’s trying to kill us. Y'know, like go see a movie.”

Her pink eyes lit up with sadistic glee. “Can it be a zombie apocalypse movie?”

He was hesitant but he couldn’t say no to her when she looked so excited. “Sure, just as long as we can hold hands.”

Dominator wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close. “Don’t worry, LP,” she said, lovingly stroking his red hair. “If the scary zombies mess with you I’ll crush their skulls and send them running back to the graves they crawled out of.”

Launchpad groaned. “Dee, stop it. I’m not scared of zombies!”

She grinned mischievously. “So that wasn’t you screaming like a baby back in the cursed graveyard?”

This time he was the one who buried his face in his hands to hide his blushing.


	9. The True You

To Launchpad, Dominator was often a mystery. She was full of contradictions, always saying one thing and doing another. Often she’d complain about how primitive and backward Earth was and how much she wanted to destroy the planet, but he never saw her trying to act on those words.

He knew she was smart enough to try, and he’d even seen her go toe-to-toe with Gyro Gearloose himself in several technological duels. And she was certainly aggressive enough to be a dangerous villain. No one besides Gizmoduck had ever made the Beagle Boys beg to go back to jail. In some ways she scared them more than any superhero could, and she was simply toying with them out of boredom.

Dominator came and went as she pleased. Sometimes she would disappear for days or weeks at a time. Then she’d show up unexpectedly in Launchpad’s room, lounging on the bed as if she had always lived there with brand new scars and bruises and stories to tell for each one. That was the part that confused him the most. She lived for action and seemed annoyed with pretty much everyone she met, but with him it was another story. She never raised a hand against him and was never as rude to him as she was to everyone else. And though she was too proud to admit it she seemed to like hanging around him. Sometimes she’d even laugh at his corny jokes, or fall asleep on his shoulder while watching TV, or smile a real, radiant smile at him when no one else was around to see it.

In those fleeting moments he thought he saw the real her, and every time he did he fell more and more in love with her. Everyone who knew him could see it. The kids would tease him about his crush while Scrooge, Donald and Mrs. Beakley would worry for his sanity. But he didn’t let it bother him. None of them knew Dominator the way he did, and he never kept his feelings hidden. It simply wasn’t in his nature to keep such strong emotions a secret. He always told her how cool and smart and pretty she was, and she would always answer with a dry “I know”. He held back on proclaiming his love for her, though, unsure of how she would react.

The first time he proclaimed his feelings for her was an accident. He’d been dazed and delirious from a particularly nasty plane crash, and when he regained consciousness her face was the first thing he saw, surrounded by smoke and fire from the plane’s wreckage. She looked like a fallen angel that escaped from hell. With a dopey grin and a slurred voice the words “I love you” had tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them.

In response she smiled at him the way she did only when they were alone. Then she pulled his arm over her shoulder and dragged him to his feet, and when their faces were close together she whispered, barely audible over the noise of wailing sirens, “I know”.


	10. Heartfelt Apology

Dominator had never seen Launchpad in such a bad mood. In fact, she had never seen him in a bad mood ever. Since he picked her up from the police station he was unusually quiet. His beaming smile was replaced by a stiff, straight line and his eyebrows were furrowed in a stern grimace. He didn’t say a word or look away from the road, although his speed was higher than the speed limit.

In the passenger seat, Dominator tried to figure out what was going on inside his head. This wasn’t the first time she’d gotten in trouble with the Duckburg Police Department, but it was the first time she’d been arrested. When they allowed her to make one phone call she called Launchpad because he was the only person on Earth who’s number she knew. He had paid her bail and the police had let her leave with him. And now here they were, driving through the night and sitting side by side in oppressive silence.

Finally, when they stopped at a red light, Launchpad spoke. “What were you thinking?”

She shrugged and stared out the passenger window. “I’m a villain, LP. Old habits die hard.”

“Old habits?” he echoed. “You were arrested for getting into a fight with a biker gang, stealing a motorcycle from them, running from the cops, and crashing through a window!You’re lucky you weren’t killed!”

“I’ve survived worse,” she replied, not looking away from the window. “And those bikers had it coming.”

“That’s not the point!” Launchpad snapped. “You told me you were trying to change, Dee! I thought you were doing so well! And then you go and pull something like this? What else have you been doing??”

Dominator whipped her head around to glare at him, hot pink eyes blazing. “Well, excuse me, Mr. Junior Woodchuck Scout! Before I ended up here I was a galaxy destroying super villain! You think it’s been easy for me to give all that up?”

“That’s not what I meant!” he retorted. “You promised me you wouldn’t do dangerous stuff like this anymore, but you did it anyway! I trusted you, and you lied!”

“I didn’t lie!” she yelled.

“Yes, you did!” he yelled back. “Don’t you get it, Dee?! Don’t you know how to keep promises and tell the truth??”

She pounded both her fists down on the dashboard and screamed “No, I don’t!!”

The car went silent except for Dominator’s shaky breathing. Launchpad stared at her with wide, anxious eyes, unsure of what she would do next.

Dominator sat back in her seat and groaned, pushing her hair away from her eyes. She was tired and sad, but mostly tired. “Look… None of this ‘good guy’ stuff is easy for me. Being nice to people, following rules, having friends, being in a relationship… I still don’t get all of it. I want to, but I don’t know if I ever will. What I did tonight… I didn’t mean for things to go so far. And now I’ve made you hate me.”

Launchpad stared out at the red traffic light in front of them, deep in thought. “I don’t hate you,” he said at last. “I’m scared. I really care about you, Dee, and I think you’re awesome. You’ve done a great job trying to change, you really have. But when stuff like this happens… I feel like I’m gonna lose you.”

She stared down at her fists clenched in her lap. “I… I’m sorry, Launchpad. I really blew it tonight. And I didn’t mean to scare you. You’re the last person in the universe I want to hurt. Heck, you’re most of the reason I want to turn my life around.”

He looked back at her in surprise. “I am? Really?”

She nodded and smiled tiredly at him. “Yeah. You’re my best friend, LP. I guess I want to be somebody who deserves that.”

For the first time that night, he smiled at her. He reached over and placed a hand on one of her fists, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Aww, Dee… You already do.”

She unclenched her fist and closed her fingers around his. “Still… I won’t let something like this happen again. I know I can do better. I promise I’ll keep trying until I get it right.”

“Thanks, Dee.” He brought her hand up to his beak and kissed it. “And I promise I’ll never stop cheering you on. You can do this. I know you can.”

They sat in comfortable silence, gazing into each other’s eyes and smiling. Then, all of a sudden, a car horn blared behind them. While they were talking the traffic light had turned from red to green.

Launchpad yanked his hand out of Dominator’s, gripped the steering wheel and stepped on the gas. “Sorry!!” he cried over his shoulder. “Sorry, sir… I mean ma'am! Sorry again! It’s dark out here!”

“Hey, hey, hey!” Dominator yelled, pushing back into her seat and pointing at a pair of headlights racing toward them. “Eyes front! Eyes front!!”

He yelped and swerved back into the correct lane, narrowly missing the oncoming delivery truck. Then he looked at Dominator and laughed in a mixture of relief and embarrassment. “Sorry for that, too!”

She didn’t answer. She was too busy laughing in the same way.


	11. Death

“You know, Dee,” Launchpad whispered to Dominator, both of them hunkered down behind an ancient mausoleum. “When you said this graveyard was haunted I thought that meant ghosts floating around going ‘oooooh’. You didn’t say anything about zombies.”

Dominator rolled her eyes at him. “Then why did you think I brought this along?” She held up an aluminum baseball bat that was dented and scuffed all over.

Launchpad spread his hands and shrugged. “I dunno, I thought maybe there might be ghost piñatas or a ghost baseball game.”

“You are so weird,” she said dryly as she picked up a second aluminum baseball bat and handed it to him.

“I’m the weird one?” he asked, reluctantly taking the bat. “You’re the one who thought beating up zombies in a spooky graveyard would be a fun date.”

“Come on, LP, don’t be such a killjoy. You’re always saying how much you live for danger, and this is super dangerous!” Her pink eyes lit up with sadistic glee, sparkling in the moonlight. “Hey, you know what would be really dangerous? Mowing zombies down with a chainsaw! Ooh! Or even better, a flamethrower! Dang, why didn’t I think of that earlier? We could have brought some gasoline and lit this place up!”

He stared at her with a mixture of horror and disgust. He kept forgetting she used to be a murderous villain until she got excited by gruesome things like this. Still, it was hard for him to say no to her when she was being this cute and giddy. “Uhhh… Why don’t we stick with the bats and see how that goes?”

“Fine,” Dominator said with a pout. “But next time we’re totally bringing a flamethrower.” Then she was back to sadistic excitement as she jumped to her feet. “Now come on! Let’s go bash some zombie skulls!”

“Dee, I dunno about this—Whoa!!” Launchpad didn’t get to finish his sentence because Dominator had grabbed him by the hand and dragged him along with her as she ran out from behind the mausoleum and charged toward the small army of zombies. As she ran she brandished her bat over her head and screamed a battle cry.

Launchpad only sighed. The things he did for love.


End file.
